Oh Crap(s).

Every week I run a games group for my residents where we play dominoes, Uno, Yahtzee, etc. Attendance has been a little lower recently so thought it best I invite people personally to join us….

Me: Mr. TD, Hey are you going to come play games with us this afternoon?! We miss you!

Mr. TD: I umm, have to be somewhere, sorry.

Mr. JW: He’s lying, he doesn’t have to be anywhere, don’t believe him!

Me: (to Mr. TD) Is that true? Why don’t you want to come??

Mr. TD: I umm, yeah I don’t know, games aren’t my thing anymore…

Mr. JW: Tell her the truth! (turning to me) He said yesterday that you are so psychotically competitive that he’d feel safer playing craps in the dark alley outside the mission than he does playing Uno with you.

[I think I will put this on my resume under Marketable Skills. (along with ghostwriting break-up letters, wedding vows and eulogies, while simultaneously finding creative solutions to avoid blind dates.)]