Tag: humor

2015

Weighty Matters.

by Rachel KarmanLeave a Comment on Weighty Matters.

(April 1st)
“What year were you born, 1971?”
“That better be an April Fool’s joke.”
“A what?”

“Can I please have your gum when you’re done with it, Rachel? I’d like to test your DNA.”

(The Monday after Easter)
“How was your weekend, Miss Rachel? It was kind of a big one for you and your people, eh? Wellllll, maybe a rough one for your Jewish side, but I bet the left side of your body was alll ‘wooo! it’s our time to shine!’ ”

“Okay, be real with me- are you more excited about your big Easter holiday yesterday or that today is the Dodgers Opening Day? I imagine you consider them both holy so I am just curious.” Continue reading “Weighty Matters.” →

2015

Better Late Than Never? A Year in Review: 2k14

by Rachel KarmanLeave a Comment on Better Late Than Never? A Year in Review: 2k14

I know what you’re thinking; it’s two weeks into the new year, you are way past due on writing about 2014, Rachel. Heck, everyone is just now ceasing from messing up the year when they sign and date things, if that’s not a clear indicator that you’re not on top of your blogging game than nothing is.

Oh, you weren’t thinking that? Well I was.

But alas, I am going to write this anyway. Truth be told, I’ve come to learn that I enjoy writing more than I do blogging- writing makes sense to me, it’s how I process and cope, it isn’t hard- blogging on the other hand forces me to do a lot of internet-y things that usually end in me wanting to throw my computer across the room. Am I old enough to become a Luddite yet? If not, am I important enough to have a HOBTH intern? Let me know if you think either of those questions warrant a ‘yes’ and then let’s talk. Continue reading “Better Late Than Never? A Year in Review: 2k14” →

2013

Thug Life.

by Rachel Karman4 Comments on Thug Life.

Mr. JC: Miss Rachel, I’m going to be honest, when I first met you I thought for sure you couldn’t handle us here, but I was wrong — I think you might be more thug than me.

Me: Ha! Thank you…I think?

Mr. JC: No, no, it’s a good thing. We need to come up with a good nickname for you, like Little Casper.

Mr. AB: Maaaaan no, that’s what every white person gets called, we need to give her a better one than that.

Mr. TF: How about Snowy?

Mr. AB: Nah man, that’s so lame. What about White Magic? Continue reading “Thug Life.” →

2013

Finding LIFE.

by Rachel Karman6 Comments on Finding LIFE.

There is a little spot on the far edge of Skid Row that I always say I’d live if I were to lose my home….what? You mean you guys haven’t mapped out where you’d live if homeless? That’s weird.

For the last several years a man whom could pass for Santa’s brother has been occupying this space underneath the overpass with his rambunctiously sweet dog. I have seen this man take in others, giving them a place to sleep in his home and watched as he has swept and tidied the place. I don’t know this man by name, but each morning on my way to work as I pass in my car, we smile at one another as his dog playfully barks at me. [read: I am a sucker for any and all dogs. I have rescued 5 from the local streets….one of whom now lives with me. Yes, I’ve accepted my fate as the Crazy Dog Lady. Oops?]

This space, this man, brings me peace.

Continue reading “Finding LIFE.” →